Here’s why I am saying that casual sex is unhealthy. We hear a lot of talk of casual sex being the new standard, the new ‘snowflake’ generation. People are encouraged to hook up and have meaningless sex, rather than bother going out and actually having a relationship. They are happy to just party, rather than pick one person and establish a friendship.
When you simply have a casual hookup with someone, you risk being in a relationship with them. They become ‘Mrs’ or ‘Ms’ to you, you have your weekends plans planned around them and then you, too, start to depend on them to meet your needs.
This is one of the main dangers of casual sex.
Unfortunately, like everything else in modern life, these new ideas can’t be taken too far. I have to say that the internet means that we are actually sometimes better than those more casual hookups. We have expectations for ourselves, and we will usually take other rules and agreements on board.
But this openness does mean that, in more ways than we’d like to admit, society is getting ever more liberal, with the boundaries of what is acceptable lessened.
Do all the things
I believe that casual sex can be safe, healthy and empowering, but it does need to be approached with respect and care.
Casual sex is easy; casual sex is hard. If you are dealing with an unhealthy casual relationship, there are likely to be underlying problems. The person you are casually dating may be too immature to handle a serious relationship, or may have other personal problems that you have yet to discover.
It is quite possible to have a casual relationship that lasts for years, though I suspect it is not a lot of fun for either party. But the trouble is that sometimes a casual relationship leads to something more serious, because you might not realise that you are dating someone or that it is not casual.
So you do have to realise and accept that, if you start dating someone, you might actually get more than you bargained for.
Encounters of the casual kind, as I have suggested, can be like sugar pills; you take a pill and suddenly you experience a wonderful day out.
Sexual feelings or desire, whether in the name of casual sex or in the name of love, can be fleeting.
What is the problem with casual sex?
This has happened to me many times. You meet a ‘knight in shining armour
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It’s normal to be a little nervous before heading into the unknown; after all, all the big relationships in our lives came from some sort of uncertainty. But the single women we spoke to all had a similar sentiment: fear was overrated. Sure, dating someone casually, taking things slow, and not getting too attached is different than dating someone you’re serious about, but they all agreed that fear was unfounded.
Similarly, four other sexually experienced women told New York Magazine’s Emily Leavenworth that they hook up without being afraid of pregnancy or STDs, and now even “friends with benefits” work for them. In short, they found a mutual benefit from casual sex that outweighed any potential negative repercussions. There’s no shame here.
How to avoid casual sex!
Casual sex is its own monster, but hey, that doesn’t mean you need to let it take over your life. Setting limits for yourself before venturing into the casual sex pool can help you get the most out of hookups and relationships.
According to safety app Safer. This includes not hiding your last name, city, or school, and speaking in a clear, not overly dramatic, voice. The note suggests that kids are technically allowed to use dating apps (even if they’re not intended for that purpose), but still suggests that schools should limit the time kids use them and set the password for their devices. “Using dating apps to meet up with someone outside of school often does not meet the intended purpose of these apps, and can lead to potential dangerous or embarrassing situations,” the note reads. “As such, schools should not allow students to use dating apps to meet someone while at school, and should also not allow someone to meet up with a student while at school.”
How to keep casual sex casual
The expectations around hookup culture are constantly changing, and there are as many ways to approach casual sex as there are people who do it. Thankfully, being a strong person isn’t exactly as reliant on one’s ability to take a good hookup. Being with a casual person is different from being with a more serious person, and that should also be taken into consideration. It is almost impossible to be sexually satisfied during every encounter, so we suggest you be realistic about what casual sex can accomplish.
Olympic judo bronze medallist Kayla Harrison has confirmed she will be married to boyfriend Jeff Halstead in December.
The 34-year-old, who competed in the 2012 London Olympics and now
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